What is to be said for Saturday, November 3rd?
Milwaukee was a chilled and windswept environ that dark and twinkling eve as we so lately happened upon it. The fat people had all scuttled back to their cottages and holes leaving only the young, lean, and arrogant to straddle the boulevards and swill their expensive potions whilst the more pneumatic populace hid and guzzled their precious barley. There was quite a gaggle of youngsters in mechanics jackets and stocking caps milling about the entrance of the globe when we pulled our rented hearse to the curb. Dressed in a sort tunic I fashioned from polyurethane and black rubber hosing, I immediately leaped out and bit one of them on the arm. As it turns out, he was the promoter and two police officers were parked in an un-marked squad right in front of us. I was bailed out only two hours later and fortunately missed the load-in. In anticipation of any potential bail problems, the other fellows had Keith Brammer of die Kreuzen lined up to replace me for the evening and perhaps permanently. They in fact, discussed the possible merits of leaving me in jail. Happily, they decided against this, and I was rescued. The charges were dropped. Before sound-check, I changed into a black scuba suit and bit every female who worked at the venue. Not bad, I thought, as it was not even 9pm. To the seeming dismay of everyone present, we played a 84 minute sound check which was comprised of our set played twice. The sound man not only turned off the PA, but went down into the basement and threw the power mains. We were undaunted as we are in possession of a thoroughly capable IT crew and we powered ourselves with the back-up generator that is normally dedicated to supplying our server.
After that workout, we all towelled ourselves off and I slipped into my Kimono and a kevlar long-billed cap affixed with a hand painted bust of Andy Gill. Wig, dressed in his customary chaps, donned his trademark black leather Stetson, and lit an obligatory clove. Matt, in a deep depression following sound-check as is the custom, brought out and began to polish the components of his air-rifle. Craig, out of sight, was administering to his harem in the adjoining room.
The performance was satisfactory if not remarkable. The video screens remained suspended, the servers ran cool and sturdy, and Wig emitted only one spontaneous stream of blood from his nostrils. One mishap: Craig broke a string and, once again, our guitar tech was on the nod, so he had to solicit someone from the audience to assist him. I would have treated the crowd to a rousing accapella but was too busy spraying Entertainer's Secret on my vocal nodes. Matt dove in and saved the day, rendering an intense bass solo in the spirit of Pastorius. This display elicited an intense response from a small cartel of blond women in front dressed in matching t-shirts each of which sported a vivid screen of Britney Spears totally nude. Photoshop enthusiasts I would guess.
Also of note: a DJ that played favorites by Tones on Tail, Parliament, and a vast mixture of new wavish and funk hits.
Sweep the Leg Johnny delivered an exciting and powerful performance and popular headliners, the Faint, turned the venue into a spirited dance party.
We will return to Milwaukee on November 30th. This will be at the Cactus Club with Silkworm of Touch & Go Records. In additon to the video, pyrotechnics, nude dancing, and other frills our audience has come to cherish, we will hopefully feature a thirty piece choir from Wautoma. Please don't miss it.
